| and that's the end folks!!! |
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| 11:53pm 02/09/2005 |
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yes so it's over :( I miss him and I feel as if it was nothing but a big mistake. I can't fix it now it's to late. New school year and lot's of decisions to make in the next couple of months. It's time to decide where I'm going to be transfering to. Yikes!!! |
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| getting nervous |
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| 12:48am 14/06/2005 |
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All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standing here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye
But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn,
The taxi's waitin', he's blowin' his horn
Already I'm so lonesome I could die (I'm not going to die I promise)
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe, I hate to go
There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I tell you now, they don't mean a thing
Every place I go I'll think of you
Every song I sing I'll sing for you
When I come back I'll bring your wedding ring (Many more years until that day comes)
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
Don't know when I'll be back again (I'll be back in August)
Oh babe, I hate to go
Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, let me kiss you
Then close your eyes and I'll be on my way
Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave alone
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane (on a train)
Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe, I hate to go
oooo I can't wait!!!!
4 more nights at home
I sure am going to miss you like crazy!!!!! |
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| So this is goodbye |
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| 12:08am 05/06/2005 |
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mood:  peaceful
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I'm ready to leave!!
Nervous
scared
Excited
Tempted
Afraid
Concerned about not being able to use my phone all summer
Again really nervous
But I can't wait
I can't wait to explore new surroundings
new faces
Israelis
Hebrew studies
Canada
smiling children
Sunsets
Trees
song filled prayers
Homesick Children to comfort
Spirit
a new friend
a new journey
~Life~
Maybe I'll love it and I'll finally make a decision about
Becoming a Rabbi
This could really be amazing and ideal for me.
So this must be right
Going away to a new Jewish reformed camp.
This could be me.
I just have to make it happen
and not give up on what it is that makes me happy.
I'm not leaving so I can get away from my family
It's just something I need for myself
I think so much clearer when I'm alone and away from my comfort zone.
Nobody is there to tell me what to do.
It's nice
I can think for myself.
make wise decisions.
Hopefully nothing less.
I'll miss you
so much
I love you
You are amazing
You really are amazing.
I'll be back soon :)
This is going to be my last entry so I just want to wish everyone a very happy Summer
Enjoy the sunshine and breath in the aroma of the trees and flowers
It's beautiful
really beautiful
Lyla Tov (Goodnight) |
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| awwwww |
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| 11:50pm 21/05/2005 |
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mood:  awake
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When Harry Met Sally is the best love story ever :)
I just love it |
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| 11:37pm 15/05/2005 |
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So things are ok now.I'm going to go away this summer, and I'm going to have fun. I'm going to relax a little bit more than I have been in the past. Life is to short to sit and mope all day long.
Time to have some fun!!! |
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| who am I |
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| 05:26pm 06/05/2005 |
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Can anyone tell me who I am?
Let me know if you have any idea |
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| 06:16pm 02/05/2005 |
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Your Birthdate: May 8 (6 days away) :)
Born on the 8th day of the month, you have a special gift for business, as you can conceive and plan on a grand scale.
You have good executive skills and you're a good judge of values.
You should try to own your own business, because you have such a strong desire to be in control.
You are generally reliable when it comes to handling money; you can be trusted in this regard.
Idealistic by nature, you are never too busy to spend some time on worthwhile causes, especially if managerial support are needed.
There is much potential for material success associated with this number.
I dont believe that all of this is true.....What do you think?
Material success is a plus, but business? |
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| one more final |
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| 12:39pm 02/05/2005 |
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My math final was tough. I couldnt stop thinking about Alex and Netta. I wish I could be there with you.
Well this semester I go 3 solid A's and a B which are pretty good looking in my book.
Now it's 1 1/2 months off before I leave for Canada. No work or anything :)
Lots of free time.
Maybe I'll actually hang out with some friends.
Who knows
I just can't wait to leave and meet new people.
Alright well I have to study for my last final
Luv ya |
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| What a lovely (gloomy) day outside |
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| 09:28am 26/04/2005 |
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2 more finals :) Yes!!! than 1 1/2 months to do absolutely nothing. No school that is, and no studying.
I'll be around |
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| Summer is on it's way |
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| 09:18am 14/04/2005 |
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mood:  sleepy
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Wow Summer is on it's way!!!
Going away to canada for 8 weeks sounds really great right about now.
oooo I can't wait.
2 more weeks and this semster is over :)
I miss you so much Netta and I am so jealous of Alex!!!! May 2nd wow |
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| just because |
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| 11:33am 11/03/2005 |
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Laughing makes you stronger
Smiling pushes fears aside
Allowing yourself to grow
heals wounds. |
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| Dear Netta |
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| 10:29am 11/03/2005 |
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mood:  determined
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It's been a long time since I've written anything in this sily journal.So I'm writing to my very dear friend Netta since there are not many other ways to communicate miles and miles apart.
Dear Netta,
your finally back. It's been such a long time since I've talked to you. Alex gave me your phone number and I promise I am still going to dial that number very soon. I have been very busy with life. Without question it consumes you.
Can you believe it's almost Summer again? It feels like just yesterday I was sitting on the green grass with you in Israel. Remember that amazing conversation we had? I'll never forget that.
This week I talked to Rabbi Bennet and we discussed rabinnical school. I am really thinking about it. If I could spend a whole year in Israel wrapped up in a beautiful country I would do anything in my power to do so. Netta I want to be back there. I feel like a part of me is still dangling over the medditterean Sea watching the beautiful sunset. I want to go back there and learn everything there is to know about Israel. While I was there I made many promises to myself. There were nights I would sit on the balcony in Jerusalem and just think about life. I promised myself I would be back there very soon. It's now time to make that a reality. I may be bored now, but within a couple years I will be somewhere that makes me happy. Life is all about choices and it's up to me to make the right ones.
I really miss you Netta.
Just remember that someday we will be dancing in our white lace skirts,and together we'll softly pronounce the words of the shema.
~Sh'ma Yisrael Adonai Elohaynu Adonai Echad.
I'll always love you and remember you. |
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| I thought this was cute |
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| 04:59pm 02/03/2005 |
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You Know You're Jewish When...
You spent your entire childhood thinking everyone called pot roast "brisket."
You grew up thinking it was normal for someone to shout "Are you okay? Are you okay?" through the bathroom door when you were in there longer than 3 minutes.
Your family dog responded to commands in Yiddish.
Every Saturday morning your father went to the neighborhood deli (called an "appetizing store") for whitefish salad, whitefish ("chubs"), lox (nova if you were rich!), herring, corned beef, roast beef, cole slaw, potato salad, a 1/2-dozen huge barrel pickles, a dozen assorted bagels, cream cheese and rye bread (sliced while he waited) .. all of which would be strictly off-limits until Sunday morning.
Every Sunday afternoon was spent visiting your grandparents and/or other relatives.
You experienced the phenomenon of 50 people fitting into a 10-foot-wide dining room hitting each other with plastic plates trying to get to a deli tray.
You had at least one female relative who penciled on eyebrows which were always asymmetrical.
You thought pasta was stuff used exclusively for Kugel and kasha with bowties.
You were as tall as your grandmother by the age of seven.
You were as tall as your grandfather by the age seven and a half.
You never knew anyone whose last name didn't end in one of 5 standard suffixes (berg, baum, man, stein and witz.)
You were surprised to discover that wine doesn't always taste like cranberry sauce.
You can look at gefilte fish and not turn green.
Your mother smacked you really hard and continues to make you feel bad for hurting her hand.
You can understand Yiddish but you can't speak it.
You know how to pronounce numerous Yiddish words and use them correctly in context, yet you don't exactly know what they mean. Kinahurra.
You're still angry at your parents for not speaking both Yiddish and English to you when you were a baby.
You have at least one ancestor who is somehow related to your spouse's ancestor.
Your grandparent's newly washed linoleum floor was covered with the NY Times, which your grandparents could not read.
You thought speaking loud was normal.
You considered your Bar or Bat Mitzvah a "Get Out of Hebrew School Free" card.
You think eating half a jar of dill pickles is a wholesome snack.
You're compelled to mention your grandmother's "steel cannonballs" upon seeing fluffy matzo balls served at restaurants.
You buy 3 shopping bags worth of hot bagels on every trip to NYC and ship them home via FedEx. (Or, if you live near NYC or Philadelphia or another Jewish city hub, you drive 3 hours just to buy a dozen "real" bagels.)
Your mother took personal pride when a Jew was noted for some accomplishment (showbiz, medicine, politics, etc.) and was ashamed and embarrassed when a Jew was accused of a crime .. as if they were relatives.
You thought sleepaway college was only where non-Jews went ... Jews went to city schools ... unless they had scholarships or made an Ivy League school.
And finally, you knew that Sunday night and the night after any Jewish holiday was designated for Chinese food.
You're proud to be Jewish - and you pass these jokes on to all your Jewish friends! |
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| :) |
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| 05:42pm 07/02/2005 |
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I can't stop smiling... what a perfect weekend away from home |
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| In complete shock |
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| 01:43pm 03/02/2005 |
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mood:  amused
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So last night I had my psych of adjustment class.For three hours I listened to 10 people present posters with themselves pasted onto it. I signed up a little late to present so I have to wait untill next week.
Let me tell you I was in complete shock the entire class period. Every other student who presented just started balling their eyes out. Its absolutely amazing what people have gone through in life. I just sat there and kept thinking to myself wow I'm such a lucky women to have so much good in my life. Yes of course there are little things that seem so huge to me, but when looking at the big picture the things that I've gone through, and thing things that my family have gone through are nothing compared to the stories I listened to last night. I sat there and I couldnt help but cry. I love psychology and if theres one thing I learned last night it's that this is not an easy field at all.I honestly dont know if I can really handle listening to people who have been through hell and back.It tears me up and I can't even relate because I have not been there, and I have not a clue what its like. You have to really listen and really understand what a human-being is capable of.
Classes like this one really make you think twice about who you are, and you really get to know much more than you may want to about your classmates. Last night was incredible and I do love this, and I want to be the one to make a difference in these peoples lives because they need someone so bad just to listen to them and understand them. |
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| ?? |
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| 04:50pm 24/01/2005 |
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mood:  bitchy
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Does anyone want to send me plane tickets back to Israel? I would just love to go and stay there for a really really long time. Anybody??? |
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| Back in the groove of things...... |
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| 10:41pm 10/01/2005 |
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mood:  chipper
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Back to school......
I think this semester is going to be alright. Getting up at 6:30am for an 8:00 class isnt the greatest, but I'll deal with it. Especially Math!!! Crazy me. Before I know it this semester will be over than it's on to the next. I like my classes this semester. It's going to be a good one. Alright well I'm out I miss you :) |
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| 12:14am 06/01/2005 |
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mood:  blah
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I don't want this break to be over. :(
3 more days together. |
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| 12:47am 04/01/2005 |
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mood:  drained
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I'm getting my hair chopped off tomorrow :) It's time for a new me.. |
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saazsparklestar's journal